Thursday, December 14, 2017

Heart vs. Body // Fiction

My heart beats wildly as I run into the dark blanket of night, but my body remains calm and subdued. My body sits in a red cushioned chair, hands folded in my lap, listening carefully to him ranting about the football game scores and how little I’ve accomplished while he slaved away behind his immaculate desk.
My body is frozen to this chair in a bright, happy house that feels like a prison, but my heart, it runs. It beats like the wings of a bird trapped in my chest; my hands clench, and my arms flay as I run and run in hope of escape. While my heart runs away, my body stays at home, mechanically washing dishes and folding things into neat, little squares.
My husband scowls at me as the fireplace shadows cast orange light onto his face. I painstakingly paint on a mask of happiness to hide my fears. I know he will bruise me, beat me, shame me like a frightened caged animal, but my heart will not be scratched or broken for it is deep within the forest running with freedom in the air where even he cannot reach me.
 In my heart, there is no plastic, fearful smile. Instead, I laugh a dark, joyous laugh, a laugh that some might call insane. 
All the while I am sitting in that same chair, not moving a muscle.
I scream, but no one seems to notice. Though my screams do not leave my lips, the acid from my despair lingers in the back of my mouth. My screams echo in my mind, bouncing off my skull never to be heard by human ears.
 I am the animal shaking in captivity in the corner of my cage hidden by expensive furniture and red, floral wallpaper that I did not choose.
 I am the wild beast that runs without shackles on its feet, dancing across every fear that used to crowd its lungs.
My body remains chained to this chair, but my heart runs further every day, threatening to pull me apart at the seams. 

8 comments:

  1. Oh my goodness, wow! That is insanely good! Awesome job!!

    ~Ceci
    alooongtimeagoinagalaxyfarfaraway.blogspot.com

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  2. Whoa. This is amazing, Eve. I feel like I'm THERE...

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    1. I'm so pleased you like it, Rosie! Especially since you are such an incredible writer. Thank you <3

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  3. wow love that photo <3 <3 <3 and this little story is really really good. my goodness. so much life in your words girlll <3
    so glad you're blogging again!!! we've missed your presence so incredibly much xx

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    1. It was fun to be extra artsy with this photograph so I'm so glad you like it. <3 Your compliments literally made my day 10 times better. Sophhyyy, thank you! How I've missed it. Busyness has kept me away for this dear hobby of mine. I'm finally on winter break so I can post all I want. Yay!!!

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  4. The description in this piece is amazing.

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    1. Vanessa you are too kind. Thank you thank you thank you!!!

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